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Wind meets caution

By monkeys, photosNo Comments

After school on Monday, Annabel was coming home with us for a lunch date. It’s nice, y’know? You’re three years old. You need a little more mealtime stimulation than moms who only get 2 hours of free time 3 days a week can provide. So Annabel was going to ride with us, and Alice would meet us anon with Phoebe the younger. Normally I drive the Passat, which has an easily-accessible center seatbelt in the back seat. Zoe and Lucy ride in their car seats and Annabel sits in the middle with a regular seatbelt on. (No officer, we’ve never…

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By thoughts4 Comments

Y’all. I came up with a new invention (one which I’m sure I’ve heard others talk about before, but this is my blog which means I can make all the egomaniacal claims I want until you call me on it in the comments). Here’s what we all need: A modulated car horn. Need to gently remind that elderly woman in the Dodge Dart that she’s still in a car and the light turned green a few minutes ago, not that it’s a big deal it’s just that you’re a teeny bit late for your pedicure? Give it a light tappy…

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Art Bruts

By monkeys4 Comments

I’m so guilty. As many of you may know, I like to draw. In fact, art plays somewhat of a major role in my career based on my bang-my-head-against-a-wall interest in making the world look “nice.” So it may come as a surprise (at least, it has to me) that Zoe and Lucy are not interested whatsoever in making art. It doesn’t matter what medium we try: crayons, paint, pens, magnadoodles, stickers, fingerpainting etc. They entertain my yearning for about 3 minutes tops, then they wander off leaving me to clean up the mess. Even their Ducks from Elmo’s (is…

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Z is for Zoe and

By monkeysNo Comments

We recently received a hand-me-down fleece that I love — it’s very bright and stripey — but it may already be too small for Zoe and Lucy. I’ve been trying to get Zoe to try it on for weeks — just try it on — so I can pass it on if necessary. But she refuses every time, no matter what kind of mood she’s in when I ask. Finally tonight I got her to try it on. (Basically it did fit, but the sleeves were a bit short.) “What do you think Zoe?” I ask. “It’s too small. We…

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By monkeys6 Comments

So a piece of rope walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a drink. “We don’t serve your kind in here,” says the bartender, gruffly. The rope walks out of the bar. Once outside, he ties himself in a knot. Then he runs his hands ferociously through his hair til it is sticking up in all directions. Then he walks back into the bar. The bartender eyes him suspiciously and asks, “Say, aren’t you that piece of rope that came in here a few minutes ago?” “Nope,” says the rope. “I’m afraid not.” Get it? A frayed knot?…

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The Myth of Mommy Brain

By monkeys, thoughtsNo Comments

I just read this article which claims that motherhood, rather than rendering us incompetent, dull-witted and boring, instead makes mothers perceptive, efficient and even socially aware. Apparently women’s cognitive abilities expand within a few weeks of giving birth, thanks to an “estrogen bath” our brains receive during pregnancy. After studying rat mamas, they’ve determined that this flood of hormones enables us to smell poop and stalk prey much faster than virgin rats. All I have to say is try telling this to all those moms who are right now standing in the middle of the kitchen scratching their heads, trying…

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Shall we start an Upside Up movement?

By thoughts10 Comments

When Lucy and Zoe were learning about things like object orientation, Lucy showed me a book that she reported was first “upside down” and then “upside up.” It was a eureka moment for me. Think about it — there’s an up side and a down side. The up side is either up or down. When and why did the subjective word “right” get mixed in there? So, that’s where the title came from. Now, onward and upward. Lucky you — Bob just installed blogging software on my site so I figured it was time to see what it is all…

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