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funny ha ha

The best wish ever

By funny ha ha, monkeys, overheard4 Comments

Saying goodnight to the girls last night, I offered my usual, “Goodnight girls. I love you. I hope you sleep like angels” sort of salutation. Lucy responded with what must have been the fondest thing she could wish for on my behalf: “Good night Mama. I hope it’s your birthday when you wake up tomorrow.”

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Zoe tells it like it is. Take 2.

By funny ha ha, monkeys, overheard4 Comments

(Second installment in an apparent series.) “Mama. Girls are prettier than boys. And. Boys are handsomer than pets.” — A little while later… In an attempt to commit this to memory so I could tell you about it tonight, I repeated it to her. “So Zoe. Girls are prettier than boys and boys are handsomer than pets?” “No mama. Girls are prettier than boys. And boys are handsomer than babies. And babies are handsomer than pets.”

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Another reason I married the right person

By funny ha ha, monkeys, overheard5 Comments

The Scene: Dinnertime chez UpsideUp Zoe: “Mama? Did you marry Uncle Mike?” Me: “No sweetie. Uncle Mike is my brother.” Lucy: “That’s right. Mama married Papa.” Me: “Right.” Bob: “And she made the right choice.” Me: “Except Uncle Mike has a nicer car than Papa.” Zoe: “Yeah. But Uncle Mike doesn’t look where he’s going.” + + + I hate to tie sandbags to the spontaneity of that exchange, but I feel it important and relevant to disclose that Uncle Mike has not ever been in an accident that he caused. We have no idea what Zoe is talking about….

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Founding Father affinities

By funny ha ha, monkeys, overheardOne Comment

LUCY: “Mama. You remember that book we read? With the boat?” ME: “The Magic Treehouse book? About the Vikings?” LUCY: “No not the Vikings. The one with the people in the boat. They rowed. In a river. With the man who told them what to do. With the war.” ME: “Ohhhh. Revolutionary War on Wednesday.” LUCY (holding up a nickel): “Yes! Look Mama. This looks like that man. George Washington.”

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A day in the life

By funny ha ha, monkeys, overheardOne Comment

Me: Taking a bite of Zoe’s neck. “Is it alright if I take a bite of your neck?” Zoe: “No. It’s not.” Me: “Why not?” Zoe: “Because then I will not have any head.” Me: “Oh no. That’s no good.” Zoe: “No. It would not be good if I don’t have any mouth or any eyes. So don’t do it.” Me: “Okay.”

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While we’re on the subject, what is a “grit” anyway?

By funny ha ha, overheardNo Comments

Today at Q Shack I overheard three Dukie boys obviously experiencing their first NC bbq: . . . . . . . Boy 1, holding up a hushpuppy: “What are these?” Boy 2, picking up one of his own hushpuppies and examining it closely: “I think it’s potato…” Boy 1 puts down his hushpuppy. Boy 3, handing Boy 1 a bottle of bbq sauce that’s on the table: “Here. I think you’re supposed to eat it with this…”

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